As the Christmas season is in full swing, my family and I are dealing with a variety of emotions as we approach our first Christmas without Curtis. It is still hard to believe that it has been almost a year now since he passed away.
I remember last Christmas there was such a somber atmosphere when we did our family portrait for our Christmas cards. It was as though he knew it would be his last. Still, he pushed on and continued to make plans to go to Florida the first week of January. Curtis wanted to make this trip special for the kids and with the help of so many, he did. Waking up on Christmas morning, the kids opening gifts that Curt had helped me pick out. This year shopping just hasn't been the same. Realizing when I write the names on the gift tags that the From: will be me missing a name. But we must continue to live. We must find new traditions but yet always remember the ones that included Curtis.
I know that many people have lost loved ones this past year. I want to encourage you - yes, the holidays are very hard. All of the 'firsts' are very hard. But through it all if you can keep calling on the name of Jesus and allowing Him to carry you, He will never let you down. It has been by the grace of God that we have made it through. There are days that I would rather stay in the bed. But I have a wonderful friend who has told me time and time again that there is no guideline to grieving. That I need to take my time and move at my pace and know that the good days will show up more often. And they have. And they will for you too my friend. My heart goes out to you all who have lost someone. Holidays are hard, but reach out and let someone help ease your pain.
May your holiday season be filled with the tenderness of God's love which is how we have a reason to celebrate.
This picture was our last year's Christmas picture. I will add one of this year on my next blog.